Better than marriage equality - many wives!

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Submitted by James Protzman on Tue, 01/02/2007 - 1:38pm.

All the hubbub about civil unions, civil marriage, and whatever, will likely fall by the wayside later this month when Massachusetts Governor Mitt Romney throws his hat into the presidential sweepstakes. Instead of debating what John Edwards thinks of gay marriage, the national discussion will shift temporarily to (1) every man's fantasy of plural marriage and (2) whether followers of the Latter Day Saints are really honest-to-god Christians in the first place.

The plural marriage business has always intrigued me because it used to be a central tenet of the Mormon faith, but was renounced because of political pressure in the late 19th century.

The Church officially renounced the practice in 1890 when then President of the Church, Wilford Woodruff, issued "The Manifesto," while under extreme political pressure from the United States government while the territory of Utah was applying for statehood. However, there is substantial evidence that the practice continued among some Mormons into the early 20th century. The Church began formally excommunicating polygamists around this time.

Beyond that, the Tubes promise to be extremely hostile to Mr. Romney on many other fronts. This video on You Tube, for example, has a particularly creepy rendition of a song that will stick in your craw for sure.

That said, I love it when the local LDS guys come knocking on my door to hand out Books of Mormon. They're so earnest and nice - and they provide all the evidence I'll ever need that human beings can and will believe just about anything.

For the record, I give Mitt Romney zero chance of being the Party of Greed's nominee, but it sure would be nice if he were. Even Hillary could take him in the general.

James Protzman's blog
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I confess to a fascination with all things Mormon

Submitted by James Protzman on Tue, 01/02/2007 - 1:49pm.

some of which are finding their way into the novel I'm working on:

On Sunday mornings Gary scoured North Myrtle Beach for treasures with his Holy Grail metal detector, walking for hours to mine the misfortunes of others. He loved the static crackling in his super-sensitive headphones and the rush of real signals beeping through the steady white noise. Last Memorial Day, the pickings were especially good. Sun-burned drunks honoring dead soldiers can lose lots of stuff in a hurry, and Gary had nearly filled the pocket of his shop apron with detected metal.

When he made one last sweep down the beach, the bracelet was singing.

These are the threads of life fully filled.

The silky string of words slipped through his skull like a brain freeze, stopping him cold in his low-tide tracks. He wavered and wobbled, swinging his detector back and forth, zeroing in on the song beneath the sand. Gary had heard plenty of strangeness growing up in a Pentecostal church, but this was the first time he’d ever come across buried music. He dug and sifted the clumpy sand, his blood pulsing faster the deeper he went.

Then he felt the quiet clink that treasure hunters die for. The bracelet was his.

Later that night he polished the thick circle of silver to a gleaming glow, discovering enough strange engravings to qualify for latter-day sainthood. Like Moses on the mountain with his magical commandments, like old Joe Smith and his wondrous golden tablets, little Gary Gray took the symbols for a sign. The bracelet’s whispery voices made him Jesus overnight.

Been there, done that...

Submitted by George Pence on Tue, 01/02/2007 - 2:09pm.

I lived in Utah from 1966 to 1980, however, I am not a Mormon. Salt Lake City, or what gentiles called "the happy valley," is the center of an eccentric culture. It has its charms, moments of humor, and qualities to respect, but Utah is also home to a hyper conservative form of group think hard to appreciate from the outside and intellectually stifling to those on the inside.

When you reduce it to its core principals Mormonism is an extraordinary belief system. One feature of its dogma is that all of us are the progeny of Jesus Christ who is currently have sex with a multitude of women on the planet Kolob. That said, many thousands of people all over the world, who are far smarter than I am, are moved to convert every year. By and large these people are good, law abiding people who make great husbands and wives, great fathers and mothers.

On a regular basis my business obliged me to visit Colorado City, Arizona, the polygamous community that's so often mentioned in recent media reports. Someday you and I should share a few stories about those visits. It could make good material for your book.

Kolob

Submitted by James Protzman on Tue, 01/02/2007 - 3:02pm.

One feature of its dogma is that all of us are the progeny of Jesus Christ who is currently have sex with a multitude of women on the planet Kolob.

Really? Where do we sign up?

And this is your 45 th wife A?

Submitted by MaxTheDog2 on Tue, 01/02/2007 - 9:08pm.

I even won Bible sword drills in Vacation Bible School!* A

Good grief! That explains your attitude to toward all religions and your obession with Moronism. You are nothing but a sword dueling old book fool who is preverted in your wildest dreams.

C'mon Anglico

Submitted by Linda on Tue, 01/02/2007 - 1:59pm.

All religions look ridiculous from the outside looking in.

Like the novel excerpt. You're a tease. I want to read a full novel. C'mon.

"Be the change you wish to see in the world." - Gandhi

Inside outside upside down

Submitted by James Protzman on Tue, 01/02/2007 - 2:07pm.

As a back-sliding Southern Baptist, I'd have to say that religions look pretty ridiculous from the inside out, too. Not that they are ridiculous . . . I fully support the right of anyone to believe anything they want . . . but they sure do look ridiculous.

That's why I spend so much time with my LDS visitors. And Jehovah's Witnesses, too. I really like hearing what's motivating them, what's behind their passion and praise. I admit I don't understand it, but I do admire it.

I used to have that passion myself, back in my teen years when I was deeply involved in church. My father was a deacon and my mom filled the little glasses with grape juice on the first Sunday of every month. I even won Bible sword drills in Vacation Bible School!

We have fun kicking Mitt around over at my pad.

Submitted by Pam Spaulding on Tue, 01/02/2007 - 2:08pm.

His shameless fawning and cooing over the evangelical vote is almost comical at this stage:

* Mitt was for homos before he was against them -- on the record

* Romney gets blasted by wingers for past pro-gay positions

* Mitt tries to clarify what he really believes

Romney's Mormon faith is going to deep-six him pronto, if this is any indication:

One-third of the (S.C) respondents said they could not vote for a member of the LDS Church for president. The results are similar to a Bloomberg/Los Angeles Times poll of registered voters nationwide, released earlier this month. That poll found 37 percent of those questioned would not vote for an LDS presidential candidate. But the South Carolina poll went further. Half of the respondents in South Carolina said LDS Church members don't believe in the Bible, Davis said, and 44 percent thought members of the church still practiced polygamy. One-fourth believed that Mormons aren't even Christians.

--
Pam Spaulding
Durham, NC USA

Pam's House Blend
www.pamshouseblend.com

Thanks for the links, Pam.

Submitted by James Protzman on Tue, 01/02/2007 - 2:14pm.

I'd say the Guv has his work cut out when it comes to "clarifying what he really believes" - and once he does clarify it, he'll be toast.

PS It's so nice having you stop by over these past couple of days!

it's been fun

Submitted by Pam Spaulding on Tue, 01/02/2007 - 2:31pm.

Though I probably should have been in bed recovering from the flu instead of blogging and commenting, but, well, I just don't know when to stop. :)

My theory on polygamy

Submitted by working for change on Tue, 01/02/2007 - 2:41pm.

There's a reason why we know Polygamists as 1 husband with multiple wives.

What sane woman would want all those men around the house? No offense guys, but really...you want an efficient, harmonious, effectively run household you don't pack it full of men!

Larry Kissell is MY Congressman

We've got to come up with some kind of spew warning

Submitted by momoaizo on Tue, 01/02/2007 - 2:43pm.

I'm at work and the boss doesn't understand why I am constantly cleaning my keyboard!

No matter that patriotism is too often the refuge of scoundrels. Dissent, rebellion, and all-around hell-raising remain the true duty of patriots.

My apologies to your keyboard

Submitted by working for change on Tue, 01/02/2007 - 4:49pm.

..but I know that you know what I'm saying.

Seriously, can you imagine the can't-change-the-empty-toilet-tissue-roll scenario x3 husbands? And let's not even start on the dirty underwear thing. Nope...not gonna go there.

Larry Kissell is MY Congressman