Tuesday Twitter roundup

Everybody's talking except the one who needs to talk:

Don't know what he thinks he's achieving by pleading the 5th, other than driving home the fact he knows he's guilty.

Yeah, I mean, no. You can thump that bible all you want to, but the crimes keep stacking up:

Dowless is a damn fool. He was already in deep shit as it was, but this is full-on obstruction of justice. And he was stupid enough to give them crib notes:

As we here in the South are wont to say, "That boy ain't right." Maybe he'll learn something serving 3-5 years...

One could go cross-eyed trying to keep up with all the flip-flops Dallas Woodhouse has gone through since November. Best to just ignore him...

Dang it, Josh. I literally can't stop watching that...

What's funny is, you *think* that makes her look bad, but it just makes McCrae Dowless look like even more of a scumbag. Stop trying to defend the indefensible. You'll be better off in the longrun.

That little weasel is even worse than Pence, when it comes to being skeered of young females...

Nothing good happens in the General Assembly after 7 p.m. Actually, you could substitute pretty much any time of the day and it would be accurate.

Great Caesar's Ghost. Michael Speciale isn't qualified to sit in the General Assembly, much less the U.S. Congress. I'm gonna have to start keeping a few of those airline sickness bags handy while I'm gathering news items...

There may be a simple explanation I've yet to come across, but I keep running into this logical pothole: Won't parents of children starting school earlier simply go to the beach earlier? Unless all schools in the state went to that calendar, the tourism industry won't be losing vacationers in late August, it will just be different people. And if you look at how snow days often delay the beginning of Summer vacation, you'd think calendar flexibility would strengthen tourism in late May/early June. I just don't get it.

Since I'm now too confused to analyze politics, here's your Onion:

I see the Illuminati has taken over the Onion, making fun of People who seek the Truth. If Bilderberg is so innocent, why are they way up there on that balcony? As usual, we'll get no Answers to our Questions...

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Comments

Bonus Onion:

Yes, thank you. That is pretty much exactly what she did, but I've got dozens of friends who admire her for speaking out. They just don't understand the real reason she's pissed. Pay attention, people.