It looks like I may have a zombie problem here in my home County, and this new strain prefers to guzzle clam juice after eating the brains of really stupid people:
Cary Allred will try to collect signatures from 3,564 registered voters so he can get his name on the ballot to run for an unexpired term on the Alamance County Board of Commissioners.
“I wanted to go down there and let people know I’m serious as death about this,” Allred said. “This ain’t no lark. And anybody who says it is, is … in outer space."
*sigh* Just f**king go ahead and shoot me now, please.