The GOP endorsement-fest

It's getting hard to keep track of, but we think it goes something like this:

  • Rand Paul endorses Greg Brannon
  • Mike Huckabee endorses Mark Harris
  • Jeb Bush endorses Thom Tillis

and in the latest news, Newt Gingrich endorses Juniorberger.

We can only imagine the conversations during the various campaigns' strategy sessions:

"Hey, does anyone know any failed presidential candidates?"
Harris: "Yeah, Mike Huckabee. He's a highly respected commentator religious nut just like me"
Juniorberger: "What about Newt? He is an icon of integrity makes headlines about marriage just like me"

The Brannon and Tillis campaigns, having not identified any sufficiently tarnished failed presidential candidates, move on to Plan B:

"Hey, does anyone know any unpopular future presidential candidates?"
Brannon: "Well, there's Rand Paul. He's an intellectual party leader a wing nut plagiarist just like me"
Tillis: "I know! Jeb Bush! Remember how popular his brother was? And he's a fine, upstanding moderate whining loser and loose cannon who will say or do anything to get elected, just like me!"

We wouldn't be surprised to hear that some of them are trying to find a way to get endorsed by ol' Jess hisself. With Plan B being Strom, of course.