Tillis Amazon review: Zero stars

Being something of a hermit, I do quite a bit of shopping online. If I have the time ... and if I take the time ... I can find detailed information about the things I need to buy, as well as many opportunities for comparative shopping. Every now and then, I find truly extraordinary reviews, like the one below. I was looking for a simple pocket folder to carry the small amount of paperwork I need to keep nearby. This one cracked me up.

Hi, I'm Laura and I'm a a pouch addict. THERE. I SAID IT. Phew, feels good to get that off my chest. No, seriously though. I love a pouch, from the teeny ones that can only hold credit cards all the way up to the giant monster clutches you could carry a baby in—and over the years I've amassed a kind of embarrassingly large collection of them, in every size, color, and material you can imagine. Well, okay, not EVERY color; no pink, purple, glitter, pastels...you get the idea. I may have two separate pouches in my purse at this very moment (one for essentials like phone, wallet, and keys; and another, waterproof, for spill-able things like sunscreen, liquid lipstick, and hand lotion), but I'm definitely not a girly girl. This rugged pouch was so far up my alley I could practically feel it touching my heart. And, hey, I somehow don't have anything canvas and/or olive drab yet, so I didn't even have to feel guilty about making my credit card take the hit.

Now, I can't speak to this item's longevity yet, since I've only had it for a day, but from what I can tell it's well-made and sturdy. The fabrication of the waxed, almost distressed-looking canvas in that dusty grey-green is almost exactly the same as my dad's old Army standard-issue duffel bag from his draft year in Vietnam. That thing's lasted almost 50 years, first warfare and then me commandeering it as my go-to college travel sack, so I've got high hopes for its mini version here. And if vintage military items are any litmus test at all, this little bag is only going to get better and softer with age.

Why am I posting this? Because I would love to find a way for We the People to give our politicians reviews in such detail, especially here in North Carolina. A number of online forums have attempted to capture citizen reviews, but none seem to have bubbled up into relevance. Perhaps someone can come up with a place where I can post this:

Yuck. I never thought I'd spend my day writing a review of a politician, but here I am. Demoralized and disgusted. The object of my dismay is North Carolina's junior US Senator, Thom Tillis. If I could give him ZERO stars, that would still be too many.

When Tillis first arrived in DC, he appeared to be properly packaged and bundled. A cursory inspection revealed nothing broken or damaged in shipping. But no sooner did we discard the plastic wrapping when we discovered a strange odor, an odor that has only gotten worse over time. Yes, there's a thin veneer of honesty wrapped around this Tillis character, but the underneath, the rot runs through and through.

With Thom Tillis, we North Carolinians thought we were getting a real Senator and a statesman. Boy were we wrong. Tillis belongs in the "used and broken" bin. His spine doesn't exist, his morals are degenerate, and he's doing the dirty work of the most corrupt president in history, a pussy grabber surrounded by lackeys. What's worse, Tillis can't even read his own instructions: he violates his oath to defend the US Constitution every single day.

Unfortunately, there seems to be a no-return policy in the Thom Tillis fine-print. Is that true? Are we really stuck with this creep? Shame on us for electing such a poor excuse for a representative. I'd send him back in a heartbeat if I could.

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Comments

Actually a good idea

I like this, but I fear that Russian bots and GOP hired interns would skew the results unless there was some way to actually prove the reviewer lived in the politician's district.