I remember when Senator Jesse Helms weighed in on all things pee-pee. It was 1987, and Helms took center stage to condemn a photograph by Andres Serrano of a crucifix submerged in the photographer's urine. His words were prophetic.

Fast forward 40 years and look at where we are. Instead of Immersion, we have Urination, where the president of the United States is being blackmailed by Vladimir Putin with sex tapes involving women peeing on each other. This would be the same president who committed adultery against all three of his wives, and is currently being dragged into court by a Playboy bunny and a porn star. This would be the pathological liar-in-chief, the king of wag-the-dog, Don-the-Conman Trump.

I've seen many attempts to explain why the evangelical right has gone ga-ga over the Donald. Some see him as a useful tool, a convenient way to trigger Armageddon. Others, let's call them the Christian Taliban, see him as a path to recreating America as a theocracy. Still others, most by my count, are simply bigots, assholes, and racists. Take your pick.

But whatever their motivation, supporters of Trump have made a critical decision about what's important to them. It's not decency. It's not morality. It's not honesty. It's not democracy. It's something as sick and perverted as the man they support. It's corrupt, unaccountable power.

If a photographer in 1987 was guilty of pissing on a plastic crucifix, the Republican party today is guilty of pissing on the US Constitution. But instead of condemning the act as Jesse Helms did, our representatives in Congress have joined in the pee-pee party.




Zombie Helms

I've wondered what Jesse might have made of Trump if he were still alive and in the Senate today.

Mulling it over the past year and a half, I've come to the conclusion that he'd line up behind Trump, just like Burr and Tillis. Heck, Helms would have probably come out strongly for Trump in the primary.

Trump really represents all of the "pet" extremist ideas that Helms championed. Poor shaming. Racism. Bigotry. Gay bashing. "America First". Tax cuts for the 1%.

Helms was the same kind of blue collar, bigoted populist that Trump is today. The only difference between them is that Helms was more intelligent about hiding his corruption that Trump has been.

You’re right about Helms

He would have been one of Trump’s main fanboys, yellow showers and all.